Tuesday, July 21, 2009
The Bid List is Out
Just typing that phrase gives me huge knots in my stomach.
Now that there’s a list of positions I might be eligible to bid on (and lobby for, and kick and scratch and fight over, all hopefully without sounding either obsequious or malicious), I’m giving myself the very rare permission to think about the future. My immediate response to this is, “Oh God oh God oh God.” This whole bidding thing didn’t go well the first time. It went particularly un-well the second time, when I’d allowed myself to hope and then was left completely devastated. And now, the third time, the process has changed and it’s all about knowing the right people from having gotten the right positions the first two times. Um, yeah. Oh God oh God oh God oh God.